Tension: Guest Blog by David Owens

04 August 2018

For this post I am turning over the reins to David Owens, an eagle-eyed editor, friend, and all-round good guy. Take it away, Dave...

Tension

When someone asks me, “what makes a good story?” I answer, “tension.”

Why is tension so important to story development? Tension is the “binder,” the element that glues the reader to the story. Tension is energy. No amount of excellent writing can overcome the lack of tension in a story.

What is tension? Tension can be many things. Perhaps a character worries about losing a loved one, or perhaps tension is the threat of a hidden mine on a battlefield. In another story the character might be forced to overcome insurmountable difficulties. Tension must exist consistently and continuously in a story.

Tension is the writer’s promise and the reader’s reward.

Tension in narrative and dialogue holds readers attention.  When a writer masterfully integrates tension into a story, the tension moves the narrative forward, but tension in dialogue is the trick most fiction writers use.  Compelling conflict is the solution. Readers love conflict, any kind of conflict, and may abandon a story the moment conflict vanishes (when it becomes a boring story). The level of conflict is unimportant, except in action scenes where conflict rages through the use of short language bursts in the narrative, and snappy dialogue. The writer’s job is to creatively integrate moments of tension throughout the work. Anything else comes across bland and unsatisfying.

Ask yourself the question, “Why do I read?” Well, why DO you read? Is it because the writer describes beautiful scenes, or is it because you search for an answer? Now ask yourself what is the question a story must answer. Now you’ve found it! Yes, tension must be the reader’s constant companion in a story. Tension grips readers and holds them until the end of the story. Readers search for an answer to the question: “What happens to the main character?”

Examine your favorite story. If the story contained sufficient tension, you finished reading and discovered you lost track of time. You became so immersed in the story time became unimportant. You found yourself on another world, in another time, in an exotic setting, but behind those settings, tension’s unrelenting power controlled you. Control tension by the use of active verbs, strong adjectives, and leave out the weak adverbs. Avoid common, and simple verbs. Show don’t Tell.

Examples:

John was running from the bad guy. ß passive verbs, telling
John ran from the bad guy.  ß weak verb, telling

John raced from the scene.  ß stronger verb, telling

Active/Showing: The villain’s footsteps thundered across the quiet parking lot. John glanced over his shoulder…

To further increase tension the writer may revise: John glances over his shoulder, smashes (strong verb) into a parked car, and then plunges (strong verb) onto the wet pavement

(Difficult to run on wet pavement. No?) I Capitalized stronger verbs used to create tension.

1. In the example the VILLAIN introduces the thought, focuses the reader away from John for a moment. (Tension/Danger).
2. THUNDERED (Tension/Alarm) is the WAY footsteps sounded to John. The word QUIET magnifies the sound and increases tension.
3. John’s fear increases, and he GLANCES (Tension/Urgency) to verify the villain’s distance from him. (Tension/Fear).

Flaccid language is not the solution to the management of voice. Neither are petty verbs. Strong (active) verbs are the writer’s weapons to expose voice and increase tension.  Most writers today, especially the self-published ones, tend to read one genre, and then copy the style of other weak writers. The examples I showed above did not contain any “ING” verbs, and not once did the word “Had” appear. “Had” is like a flashing billboard notice – “Warning. Passive voice ahead!”

Passive voice may be identified easily. Some of the word indicators are: Had, Was, and Were. ING verbs weaken any scene and dilute conflict. An unfinished draft about the “Dangers of Passive Voice” sits on my desktop, and perhaps I may be honored to post it in this blog at a future date.

Use the thesaurus to find better verbs, better words, and integrate those words into your story.

Copyists do not often find success. To avoid “Copyism,” read outside your preferred genre.

Success comes from bright, original stories, with intense characters and powerful writing, not from the passive, uncontrolled language of amateurs. Copy not another writer. Be yourself and let your language cause you to soar above mediocrity. Be not satisfied with simplicity, but write engaging tales that flow from your keyboard with energy and passion.

Write well,

Dave

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David A. Owens is a writer and editor from Murfreesboro, TN. He has published Science Fiction, Horror, General fiction, and non-fiction. Questions or comments may be addressed to him by email: editor@netsite21.com

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Picture for today is from Calvin and Hobbes. Might be some tension there. Wonder what they are talking about? Or should I say yelling about?

May your days be good and long upon this earth. Unless you go to Mars. And then I hope you rot because I'd be a little jelly. 

Versions, "On a Pale Horse" and Action Verbs

20 July 2018

As a writer, you have to keep your edits straight. I'm getting ready to release a few of my short stories for sale outside of anthologies when I realized I had three different versions of one story. Nothing too major, one was an edit by the publisher and another was an edit from a friend, while the third was the original submitted version. It is a little interesting to see the differences in the edited versions.

Another thing I am trying to improve upon, besides organizing, is using action verbs in my writing. Just need more writing practice methinks. I found a great example, even almost an over-use of action words in my opinion, while I was re-reading On A Pale Horse, by Piers Anthony. Great great book and the first book in a wonderful series (Incarnations of Immortality). 

Here are the first two sentences of the paragraph that caught my eye:

"The Doe quarterback snatched the skin and faded back for a throw. She heaved it forward just as two Ewes stampeded toward her."

As you can see from the first two sentences from the book, action verbs are everywhere: "snatched", "faded", "heaved", "stampeded".

Without action verbs, it would read like so: "The Doe caught the skin and stepped back for a throw. She threw it forward just as two Ewes ran toward her."

Reads fine like that, but not great. Action.

If you don't have the book, you can read more of it here: Page 26

And then you better fix your library and go get a copy! [On A Pale Horse Kindle edition] For those of you still on the fence, here's the back copy: 

“Shooting Death was a mistake, as Zane soon discovered. For the man who killed the Incarnation of Death was immediately forced to assume the vacant position! Thereafter, he must speed over the world, riding his pale horse, and ending the lives of others.”

Very interesting proposition. 

The rest of the series focuses on a different Incarnation. One of my other favorites is Chronos, the Incarnation of Time. Evil is pretty interesting too. That's a true author right there, who can write about the root of all evil in a way that makes you want to read it. 

Fair warning though, the books do cover some very controversial topics, to include why God doesn't do enough to prevent evil from taking over the world. Very hard stuff to read for believers, even if it is set in a fantasy setting. I reread And Eternity, the last book in the series, and was taken aback by some of the passages. 


Picture for today: 

The cover of my paperback copy of On A Pale Horse has a wonderful piece of work by Michael Whelan, titled "Thanatos." Thanatos is the Greek word for Death. He was the son of Nyx (goddess of night) and the brother of Hypnos, the god of sleep. Interesting set of relationships there.

Link is to the image on the author's website: Michael Whelan